Honouring Your Loved One’s Wishes
Planning a funeral, or dividing up a person’s belongings after they’re gone, can be a potentially difficult process.
How we would wish to remember a person may be different to how others wish to remember the same person, and also different from how that person wishes to have themselves remembered.
But it’s important to remember that it is your loved one’s death, and they should have the primary say in how they wish their final arrangements to play out.
Going Out On Their Own Terms
We all wish to control the direction of our own lives, and we shouldn’t assume this is any different in death. Having control over how they are to be remembered – or how their possessions are to be divided up – is an important aspect of a person’s readying themselves for death.
Some people make very detailed plans for their funerals, while others may request only a song, or that a particular person makes a speech.
It is important to respect the dignity of the individual you are saying goodbye too, and it will provide comfort knowing that you paid them this final kindness.
Especially in our modern age, it is often the case that people of conflicting faiths and religious ideas will be in attendance at the funeral. It may be the case that those charged with organising the funeral are of a different religious inclination than the loved one they are saying goodbye to.
The prospect of death can affect how people view things like tradition, faith, ceremony, and religion. Some who have previously expressed no religious beliefs may nevertheless request a religious service. Perhaps they have come to a new religious understanding late in life, or perhaps they simply value the traditions and community values embodied in that tradition.
If you are surprised by a loved one’s wishes and believe that the wishes do not accurately reflect the person you knew – remember that people are complex and that you may not have had time to understand the reasons and motivations that lay behind the choice.
It’s best to respect that the person made the choice for their own reasons, and remembering them in one way will not stop you from remembering them in your own personal way.
Dividing Up the Estate
Some people make detailed wills allotting particular items to particular relatives or friends, while some leave a direction to simply divide their belongings equally between their children – while others still might donate all they owned to a charity of their choice.
In the absence of such documents, there are standard legal rules that fairly govern who is entitled to what.
It’s very sad to see people squabbling over their late loved one’s possessions instead of celebrating and mourning the life that person lived. It always helps to remember the loved one and put their interests first on your own.
The Perth Cremations family bring a personal understanding to planning funerals and remembrances. It is our goal to provide a comfortable and affordable service that best secures the wishes of the late loved one as well as their family and friends. Contact us today for a free quotation.